You don't have to do anything special to get the attention of the other moderators. We all get notified of new meta posts when we log in, and usually keep track of the discussions. Snailplane and I can both be pinged in our main chat room. If you truly feel like there is an issue that needs to be escalated, you should use the contact us link and talk to someone on the SE team.
I'm sorry you perceive some of the discussion here as personal. It's not intended to be. I think that you've misinterpreted J.R.'s interest in both your original answer and your meta question. The question you answered came to the attention of the moderators because of 2 community member flags and an automated flag on a low quality answer that has since been deleted. J.R. probably saw the flag and looked over the question and the rest of the answers just to see if there was anything else that could be improved.
Each of the ELL moderators was an active community member before we were elected as moderators. We don't suddenly stop wanting to interact with the site the way we did in the past and only do moderator things after the election. We want to ask and answer and edit and discuss just like any other community member, but a ♦ isn't a hat we can put on and take off.
While I understand that some folks assume we always speak and act as a moderator, I don't think it's fair to label something a "moderation culture" issue when the issue has only occurred once in all of your posts here, and the person that edited solely to remove the "Hope this helps!" is not a moderator. Interestingly, that is the same person calling for a moderator to resign, so you would be hard pressed to find someone else on this site more opposed to our current moderation culture. If you look over the discussion on How helpful is it to add "Hope this is helpful!" to an ELL answer? both J.R. and I (before I was a moderator) say that it's not constructive to edit posts simply to remove "Hope this helps!" and similar expressions.
You responded the correct way when it was suggested that your question may have been a duplicate - you edited the question to explain why it's not. If a moderator had voted to close your question as a duplicate, it would be closed now instead of in a queue waiting for other community members to review the suggestion. It is impossible for a moderator to cast a non-binding close, delete, or reopen vote.